CCFO

Yesterday brought with it some good news- finally- with the departure of Boris Johnson from Number 10 Downing Street. On Wednesday night he seemed to have gone into full on bunker mentality, hiding in a hole in the ground, last days of Der Fuhrer madness, claiming to have a mandate of fourteen million (that's not how British politics works) and determined to plough away and 'get on with the job'. Then, on Thursday morning, he was announcing his resignation. In the words of Ernest Hemmingway and a quote I've seen in a few places recently, from The Sun Also Rises, a character named Mike is asked how he went bankrupt. 'Two ways. Gradually', he says, 'then suddenly'.

I didn't feel the jubilation I thought I'd feel at seeing him go, not last because his departure speech was spectacularly charmless- it's all everybody else's fault. That's been his default position throughout life. He was never fit for office in the first place and there's no surprise that a man who's been sacked for lying previously should eventually be got rid of for lying. What happened in between- illegally proroguing parliament, repeated misconduct in office, £850 a roll wallpaper and undeclared donations, the deaths from Covid of all who died due to him locking down too late in March 2020, spreading infections through the Eat Out To Help Out campaign and 'saving Christmas' later that year, Partygate, presiding over an administration that received over 120 fines for breaking lockdown rules, intentions to break international law over his own Brexit deal and the Northern Irish border etc etc- was all par for the course for someone who believed that the rules that others abide by didn't apply to him. But in the end, the lying got him. Lying connected to sexual misconduct and cronyism, aptly. He wants to hang on as caretaker according to reports yesterday because him and Carrie have planned to have their wedding reception at the PM's official residence Chequers which seems completely fitting for the pair of them. I look forward to the public inquiry into the his handling of Covid. His supporters keep saying he 'got the big calls right' but I can't think of any- in fact, he got them wrong. And any Prime Minister would have done the same with the vaccination campaign. 

Meanwhile, those members of the Cabinet and the wider Conservative party who like Hemingway's Mike, gradually and then suddenly, found their integrity/ backbone can go fuck themselves too. They put him there in 2019, knowing what he was like and what they and we would be saddled with. Over the last few days it's been noticeable how many of them urged him to resign to do the right thing for 'the party and the country'. In that order, always. The survival of the Conservative Party and keeping it in power is the main thing that the Conservative Party cares about. The rest of us are collateral damage in the ongoing Tory Party psychodrama and especially it's relationship with Europe (which is why we're here isn't it? David Cameron called the referendum to shore up Tory party unity. Johnson is a result of that decision). 

The expectation that things will improve now seems pretty naive. They, the MPs and party membership, will elect someone who is a combination of rabid right wing/ incompetent/ over- promoted. Given that the Conservative Party has given us in succession the three worst Prime Minsters in living memory, I don't have much faith in them doing any better this time around. Johnson and Cummings purged all the relatively sensible ones back in December 2019. What's left is detritus floating around after the ship has sunk below the surface. 

Julian Cope recently announced a new song/ single, available from his Head Heritage website as a download (the CD single sold out quickly). It's called Cunts Can Fuck Off and it's more fitting for Boris Johnson today than any other person I can think of. There's no video/ audio of the single version available. Instead, here's Julian at the Dreamland Ballroom in Margate in January 2020, performing Cunts Can Fuck Off live. 

For your download pleasure instead here's the Archdrude back in 2005 on his Citizen Cain'd album and a song that sounds like The Stooges on Gimme Danger. 

I'm Living In The Room They Found Saddam In